Someone will give you the experiences you crave and make you happy. I promise that I am going to do everything in my power to make that a reality for you and I want YOU to hold me accountable to it. You go in thinking that he is a shoe in to message you throughout the period but it doesnt happen at all. The BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS SUCK IT UP AND PUSH FORWARD! Our situation took a toll on it because we cant see each other a lot because of the pandemic and she doesnt have freedom coz shes assisting her cousin for his online class except weekends and also for some restrictions from her aunt. However, there is one area where we are different and that has to do with communication. In other words, in that massive guide I actually recommend that you are the first one to make contact with your ex after the no contact period. We dont know what will happen. The no contact rule was born from this type of thinking. Answering an ex during no contact: If you were too distant in the relationship Let's say that part of the reason (or maybe even the entire reason) behind why the relationship ended between you was that you neglected your partner. I tried to find a solution to solve this problem but she always hung up on me. She is likely to experience significant grief during this time of no contact. She said thankyou we were laying in bed at this time and she started to kiss me the first time she had all day, I then stupidly thought to try to initiate sex with her as I thought she was kissing me so why not see, she said is that all I want and is that the only reason I stayed, it wasnt at all, but I asked her why she had been avoiding it as we hadnt had sex in 2 weeks, she had told me previously how important it was to her in a relationship. Eventually she got tired of me. . I wanted to impose the No Contact rule but eventually I broke it. Sometimes it really pays to be the first one making the move on your ex because not only can you control things a little bit better it is always kind of nice when a guy feels wanted. I did not wanted really get committed too soon in a relationship and would have preferred to take my time too. Your ex is happy with the way things are, so he or she simply doesn't need to contact you and discuss unimportant things. But hey, I was young and I didnt know how to handle my emotions. I have seen a lot of people with that attitude fail but I have also seen a lot of people with that attitude succeed. She cheated before. So, there is no use getting all depressed over a strategy that is literally at its beginning. I havent messaged him for over 5 weeks. Don't get comfortable and slide back into old habits. 5. Its been 5 months and no contact. In other words, his heart is having a major battle with his pride. Strategies to overcome a narcissistic co-parent include . Sometimes it is up to you to reach out and form that emotional attachment. Like people said above, We took our power back from the experience of being dumped.. and to them it probably looks like you don't care anymore and blocking you is trying to get your attention and maybe have you feel a type of way to reach out @ some point. He actually said he isnt sure why he doesnt love me, maybe its hes afraid. Thats when i decided to call it quits. When you were a small baby and they neglected you for even a few seconds what did you do to get their attention? My ex (19F) broke up with me (18F) September of last year. This exists in a variety of different forms. Its been a week, probably not long enough. Unfortunately, you likely won't get him back this way unless your ex gets hurt so badly, he abandons his pride and finds alternative ways to contact you. Secondly, I can tell you that I am absolutely thrilled when a girl takes the initiative to message me. He doesnt speak until today. When you couple this resentment with the no contact rule you get what we are talking about here with an ex trying to get back at you. Now, this brings up an interesting question. Hi V, so I would suggests that you reach out at day 30 since you were getting along well. We had our first and only kind of argument, she had been a little distant with me for a few days I could sense something wasnt quite right, i went to her house on the weekend we had a nice day together, her brother and mum were there and a few of her brothers friends came over, we had a bbq. We did not communicate well at all or I feel would could have recovered. It is a well known fact that I have talked to over 24,000 women through this site and let me tell you that when you talk to that many people you start to learn a thing or two. Then all of a sudden after talking normal for 5 days she seemed cold again, I questioned it, said I was confused one minute she is talking the next she isnt, she said she found it stange I told her fuck you and had a problem with remembering things, I said I had apologised for that and it was 2 weeks ago, she said she didnt want to accept the apology she always accepted things in the past with exs she didnt want to accept and it made her sick. Trust me. Lets say that you decide that you want to embark on the 30 day no contact period. Don't immediately reply and take some time to think it over to figure out what you ultimately want out of this interaction. Dumpees assume that dumpers are coming back around, but most of the time, dumpers are showing interest and expressing themselves strongly only because they want reassurance and help. Remember, the guy who is stubborn may want more than anything for you to contact him but he just cant get out of his own way sometimes. 4. 4. I have no intention of getting him back or being with him . Also, I enjoyed reading your 5-stages of grief for the dumper. Everyone has the right to leave a relationship. I love and miss him so much, Hey Claire, it is only you who can deicide if you want to move on or not, I am happy to give you advice with whichever path you choose. Read this before contacting the mod team. Should You Go No Contact With Your Situationship? Unfortunately, there is no right way to stay in your exs life and win them over. You know, the he is going to have to text me if he wants to talk type of attitude. Remember, your main goal here is to get your ex back and in order to do that communication is key. , This may work in some situations but 8 have serious doubts.and I know for sure it killed my relationship.i kicked my commonlaw girlfriend out for not communicatingbreaking all our relationship rules and boundaries by planning to move out behind my back.qhen I called her on it she broke down into name calling and lies..so I locked her out violence was a.step away and two kids were in the house..i was not going to allow that.after i locked her out she no contact melol big mistake.you do not ever no contact someone you love this will destroy trust and shows a COMPLETE lack of respect to the person you love anyone who does this to me will never see me again period.i filed we are now in court contact through lawyers only.dont try the no contact with a real man its internet bs. These two reasons are the only perpetrators and the main reasons why you as a dumpee may think that blocking your ex to get him back is a good idea. She is going on a lot of trips, skiing every weekend, out with friends, and spending a lot of money on Distracting herself with everything she can possibly do. Should I reach out to him? Youll appreciate your new partner that much more. However, after your 30 days are completed he hasnt contacted you and you are left feeling pretty depressed. Should I continue to impose the NC rule on her? I strongly suggest you let her think what she wants while you find someone who appreciates and values you. They meet someone new all the time, so they can actually forget someone they didnt care about. He wants to make sure that you'll see his name on the screen after a week of radio silence. So, if the longest you've gone in a year, curiosity is likely to get the better of him by, for example,rel 18 months. Thank you so much Your ex has already broken up with you and broken the trust, so your ex focusing on something or someone else wont make much of a difference. Hi Alice, I think you have been clear with what you want from him and he has said he is not ready for that commitment yet. Appreciate the effort though if youve replied. This is the 1st time we havent spoken. I honestly do not know what to do now because I am heart broken and feel shattered. To start with a little bit of hope to cling to, rest assured that dumpers dont just forget dumpees. They are invested in avoiding their feelings.especially intimate ones like empathy, caring, love. Allow yourself to release the pain. University of Idaho murder suspect Bryan Kohberger may have been driven to kill by his history of social issues and a possible "incel complex," a former FBI . I guess the two go hand and hand dont they? Well, just because a man is stubborn and wont contact you doesnt mean that he doesnt miss you it just means what we all already know, hes an idiot :p . My pride told me not to do it but my heart wanted to so bad. In other words, the how part of him getting back at you?. Your ex will never appreciate and want you when you are still in their life, wanting to communicate with them, and prove some sort of change. It can be entirely possible that the no contact rule was working you just have no idea because he has an amazing poker face. I decided to walk away coz I felt i was being taken for granted. I have already defined what the no contact rule is in the opening paragraph of this guide but I havent really talked about what the purpose of it is. To reiterate my previous statement, staying in deliberate contact with your ex that doesnt want to hear, see or be reminded of you, is a huge mistake. How long do you recommend I do no contact before reaching out? Hit the gym, get new clothes, meditate, hang out with friends who make you feel awesome 5. Your ex might have unfriended you on social media, but there could be a range of reasons why they haven't blocked you. If your ex is constantly viewing your profile and posts, it might be time to take action and block them . Does this mean that you are going to have to be the one to press the action after the NC rule is completed? Yes, there are time where you have to view it as a game (the talking phase, getting your ex back, etc.) It would help your ex feel better and give your ex enough time to experience life without you. Hi Mavis, you would need to do a 30 Limited no contact as you live together (I assume you still are) I would also have to assume by trying for a baby and it hasnt happened yet that maybe there was tension between you both. Well, you probably threw a tantrum. In y case both damaged by past relationship and on top 2years go I lost my daughter. Their status messages are going to show up on your news feed. After that happened he lost his job and had issues with his family and has had a pretty deep depression going on Ive stuck around and said I wasnt going anywhere but conversation started to be lucky if I got one to two texts a day. No Contact Rule is equal to leaving your ex-partner alone for some time (i.e a few days, some weeks, 30 days, 45+) or giving your ex some space that provokes his/her thoughts regarding your relationship. Well, lets assume that you are embarking on a 30 day no contact rule and lets say that after 21 days your ex boyfriend hasnt gotten in touch with you. They will sit around and say, Hes going to have to text ME first if he wants a date with me.. I want you to close your eyes and imagine something with me for a moment. He has said from beginning that he wasnot ready to committ to a relationship. I asked her about it she said it was the last thing she wanted right now, I asked to talk about it she said she had just told me all her problems was it not obvious she wouldnt want to do that, she turned over her back to me and I was still talking, I said I dont want to talk to the back of your head, she said talk to my ear i just wanted to know where I stood and did she want to carry on together she wouldnt give me an answer, I got up, it really frustrated me, id listened to her, why couldnt she talk to me about this, with that I got up, I was angry, first time Id ever been angry with her first time she had seen me get angry, I said fuck you to her I straight away realised what I had said and said I am so sorry you didnt deserve to be spoken to like that, she asked me to leave, said she didnt want a relationship with someone that says fuck you to them, I apologised but I know it didnt make it ok though. She asked me to leave again so about 30 mins later I did after probably spending that 30 mins annoying her more trying to apologise and make it ok. 2 Days went past we didnt speak, then I sent an apology to her, she responded saying how tough she was finding life and she would rather be alone now and I desevered someone with better mental health she said she didnt think it was wrong that i had said about sex as I was in a relationship with her and thats what people do so she understood why I mentioned it. Neither of us have contacted one another. She is the one with the emotional detachment issuenot you. I dont know if many of you know this but this website wasnt actually supposed to be a blog. It would be healthy if your ex could forget about you for a while though. And if you want to confide in us instead, do that by signing up for breakup coaching with us. Maybe you have just started it or maybe you are coming close to your end date. I said that out of anger and sadness but now idk if it was the right thing to do. Or would some variation help? Some men just take longer than others to make a move. I wasnt her first boyfriend but I was her longest relationship so far (2 years) and she always told me I was the best boyfriend she had. she had met all my family and me the same with her with the family she has here!! He wanted to meet and said that he understood that he loves me but is not ready to propose. However, when it comes time to actually build or grow your relationship communication is going to be required. You get to control when the conversation is started and assuming you play your cards right when it will end. Does your ex boyfriend even need to contact you during NC for you to be able to get him back? i been out of the grid for 10 days so far, because even if we broke up 3 months ago, she moved to her apartment the 1th of August, I helped her to find the apartment to move, i went to the viewings with her bcs we live in Barcelona, and she does not speak spanish, I even helped her pack some things just because i wansted the best for her. My ex texted . Hi Mr J What to say? This time she didnt want to accept it with me or anyone that would tell her fuck you. January 15, 2023 12:57pm. I will keep applying the no conctac rule. I have been also working out and focusing on myself because I know its important. If he does happen to get in touch with you from anywhere between 21-30 days then I would consider that to be a pretty long time for an ex boyfriend to not respond to you. That reason is that your ex doesn't want to get back with you. Maybe they really have moved on and feel ready to rip the bandage off. I feel that women often have an advantage over men because women are constantly talking to other women about their feelings. People struggling with this will even ask their friends what they think is going on with the ex and if they think that the ex can be gotten back. I have no idea but my ex did the same thing, 5 months after our last talk, he blocked me. I didnt respond. Hello! Just not for her. My Ex Won't Leave Me Alone! Taking his or her focus off you and putting it on something or someone else would allow your ex to distance himself or herself from issues that created a lot of negative emotions. On day 30 of her no contact period her ex finally broke down and sent out a message to her. I accepted the ring and later brought it back to him because I felt we should get to know each other better. My ex has a pattern of exactly 3 weeks after he breaks up with me to come back. He responded again within 2hours.after that NC is continuing. In the end our relationship wasnt very physical anymore (I mean sex, because we did kiss a lot and cuddle all the time). After we split within two weeks he started dating someone else who he is still with. Most women get extremely depressed when an ex boyfriend doesnt message them at all during the no contact period. When I wanted to work things out he tried but then later retracted and said that the distance wouldnt work out for us since he had moved back to California and I stayed in Oregon. Love your honesty, made me really think about my actions and his. I cant get my head around the sudden change! Work was busy etc. Have you ever noticed how crazy people get when you ignore them? Now heres the problem. Thanks! Find many great new & used options and get the best deals for Unfriended (DVD, Widescreen) - Ex Library - - **DISC ONLY** at the best online prices at eBay! It depends on what they say and if your ex keeps texting you, but in general you should respond to an ex boyfriend or girlfriend's text by being happy and lighthearted. Speaking from personal experience I can tell you that any time a girl I really like ignores me it bugs me on a deep level. I tried to reconcile with no avail. Your ex won't forget about you during no contact To start with a little bit of hope to cling to, rest assured that dumpers don't just forget dumpees. Why? After the no contact period is over. For some reason every time I think of this example I think of your ex boyfriend just sitting in a dark room chanting: Ill show her Ill show her Ill show her.. Whatever the case if your ex boyfriend hasnt contacted you yet dont freak out. Defriending after a break up is a very different move for people than removing someone's cell phone number from their phone. For example, I remember when I was younger and a girl I was falling for wouldnt respond to my texts I logged on to Facebook and looked at her profile to see if she was online. Its really driving me crazy now. What about when you were in high school and you really liked a boy who wouldnt give you the time of day? The truth is that he doesnt really need to contact you. I am trying so so hard to push past my urges not to message him. Would highly recommend to anyone wanting assurance and a little bit of female guidance from a different point of view. You will never find the respect and commitment you deserve with her. Would you like to know where I came up with that mindset? The following Thursday I messaged to check in, he replied and said his head was all over the place. Make sure you dont pressure him. You start off with really high hopes that throughout this process he will end up contacting you. I know that was an incredibly weird picture for me to paint right now but the point I am trying to make here is that your ex boyfriend knows that deep down HIS silence will hurt you and its his only way of getting back at you without actually seeming crazy. Im really hurt about the fact that she could move on so quickly, but do keep wondering all the time if no contact is the right approach, and keep wondering even more if she is missing me and doing all these things just to get over me. However, I still did not feel confident as a woman, I did not feel that we were planning the future together. There's no such thing as an altruistic . I am going to make this really simple for you. Same thing happened to me! Wondered if you could advise. I have done some really shameful things when I have been ignored in the past. It just so happens that the time I did look at her profile she was online and I remember I blew her phone up angry that she was ignoring me. Or should I try to reconnect and sort things out with her.. My ex boyfriend broke up with me two months after we moved in together after an argument. and yes i still love him and want him back but he with someone else and 4 days after saying he got new girl he told me to move on and let him be.i wonder what wrong i did.i still miss him alot and yearn for him and i was loyal to him whole time we dated.it hurts still and i want him backIm in rebound relationship with a man whose behaviour and temperament is like of my exwhat i do now..help me out thanks in advance , I need help and advise. 5. Do I mention hes deleted? In so doing, you would only anger them, destroying your chances forever/longer. If he contacts me then he contacts me. Since this guide is specifically focusing on men who havent contacted you during NC lets use that as an example. Ok, so most men are more than happy to feel victimized if they were the one who had to initiate the breakup. Heres The Truth, How To Be Mentally Strong After A Breakup, How Attachment Styles Can Help You Get An Ex Back, How To Get Him Back If He Has A Girlfriend, How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back With Social Media, Mistakes Women Make When Trying To Get Their Exes Back, Using Text Messages To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back, What Your Ex Says Vs. What They Really Mean. Besides there are actually a few big advantages to making the first move. The breakup is here to teach you a lesson. The best thing you can do is to move on. Thus, many women feel almost entitled when it comes to men talking to them. Next morning she tweet this : You know when bitches be caught up on one guy in a world of 7.7 billion people? She doesnt seem like the kindest person. I would suggest that you spend some time working on yourself, spend time with your friends and family especially when he does get back. It could be that they want to keep tabs on you, or they're hoping to get back together with you one day. what should I do? she looks like shes doing well without me, I have been so sad the month and I just want her back and i dont know what to do anymore. It could be entirely possible that your ex boyfriend has gone through the following progression. Men like to be left alone after the breakup. Let him decide if he wants to be with you. I cant understand why he has done this as hes always been so set on being with me. 3. They might want to be friends, they might want reconciliation, or they might want validation. In that case, you should carry on with no contact and continue to detach and feel better. Your reply to your ex should be short and sweet. So my boyfriend and I broke up a little bit less than a week ago on Thursday, and I havent texted or talked to him since Friday, implementing the no contact rule. but I will appreciate your opinion about my story. Easier said than done but I believe in you. Its just the way it works. Can Breaking Up Strengthen A Relationship? U wish That for your Ex no wonder he left you and you deserve it. If the dumper feels guilty or remorseful for leaving the dumpee (especially if she left the dumpee for someone else), wouldnt no-contact actually help the dumper move on quicker? Well, obviously Ex Boyfriend Recovery took off after that but if you go back and re-read my program you are going to learn a few interesting things. When someone asks why my ex blocked me, then this may refer to a blockade in front of you everywhere. 2. to name a few. I was at a friends party and her sister put on their stories of them drinking and she looks so happy, is she over me? I said that I am a normal simple woman and I would like to have family, that I would like him to propose to me. Your ex may not ever want to be with you again, but your ex definitely wont forget about you. And you will be looking at all the pictures they upload. In other words, if the dumpee is out of the dumpers sight, why wouldnt the dumpee also be out of the dumpers mind? document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Too many people fail to realize that being in love has one big negative, loss. Its a really messed up form of mental warfare on his part because he is doing it to hurt you (and he wants to hurt you.). Ive not contacted her since she didnt reply to that message and that was 5 days ago, I dont know how long to leave it, 30 days seems abit too long seeing as we were only together 2 and half months? I would suggest that you allow a 21 day no contact before you speak with him again. 1. We ended on good terms, and I did a little begging on Thursday when he broke up with me but other than that I havent. Try to behave in line with confidence and high moral values as your ex doesnt want to see that youre broken-hearted and uncertain about your abilities and worth as a person. The ultimate purpose of the no contact rule. If he or she does see this side of you, your ex is going to avoid you like the plague. These things are completely out of your control. Allow her to experience what its like to be with others if thats what she truly wants. Hes wanted to see me and Ive always just been nervous to see him again about a month in after 4-9 hour phone conversations he said I love you and weve been saying that for the last three months we got into a fight about a month ago he was upset I hadnt come to see him but we continued on talking hes told me Im the one for him hes talked about houses to buy and having kids with me and that he thinks Im his twinflame hes even read books about twin flames hes sent me. However, if you try to call and she doesn't answer, don't worry. Cant understand what is going on. Do I continue to wait for her to reach out or move on? We werent arguing much and I havent been able to understand his reasoning behind it. I feel for you.its painful losing someone you love. Ailie, I would suggest that you go a full 45 days NC and when he does come back that you explain this is the last time you are willing to make things work and if he leaves again you are happy to start moving on with your life. As a matter of fact, your ex will remember you when the new person reminds him/her of you or when your ex does something he or she did with you. I thought about it and I wanted to give her a second chance but she now wants time as well apparently because of unfairly I treated her. Something my ex said in a conversation still leave me thinking if I was an asshole during our relationship. But if your ex is smart, your ex will work on them so that your ex doesnt encounter the same issues in the next relationship. They may not like dumpees and have much respect for them, but they dont just forget they dated them. We had rented our apartment together and the 23th August we went for the sign off, I found out about this other guy from malasya who left a few days after that day back to his country, and obviusly hurted me a lot and I say a few things to her, no bad words, just the truth, and bcs of it she blocked me everywhere, social media phone email etc ecte cte the 15 Of September i made a call, we spoke for 10 minutes, she was receptive with what i had to say, I was just wishing the best luck for her and telling her that I had no resenment. One example is that she is fond of writing (novels, short story etc). I got as far as typing the text message that I wanted to send into my phone but for whatever reason my pride prevented me from hitting that send button. Also, I have the option to move out of state for a new job.should I take that, or continue to be in the same city, despite her not knowing where I am etc. What we need to do is to break this undesirable association. It sounds like you probably had feelings for your ex as well. What we are going to be talking about in this article is going to be a little involved and will require a bit of foundation on your part (i.e. Should I contact him after the no contact period?. Answer (1 of 3): I can relate to your girlfriend as I did the same thing recently with my ex. We broke up on a Sunday and whilst I said i thought there was something to fight for he was clear wed made a choice to part ways and that was right. This article is amazingread it every day as long as it takes for you to stop enabling her. If your ex chose to do so, let her. She would concentrate more on the things she wanted to do. What does this mean?) I got a positive reply saying hes really missed talking over the last few days and would really like to talk soon. To you, its all or nothing, as there is no middle option. So, when you use the no contact rule on these type of men what is going on in their heads? You need to love yourself more. That likely wont end well for you as youll soon exhaust the person youre with and suffer another romantic rejection. Assuming that your guy has followed the progression I outlined above and is holding resentment towards you for the breakup that occurred you can probably expect the following things to be going on in his mind: You can always expect a little bit of stubbornness to be involved when it comes to someone using silence as revenge. You have been in the no contact period for about 10 days but he hasnt contacted you. Be mindful of your response to their text. It became more fight then friends with us. Hope to hear from you soon Zan! He suddenly flared up and told me he does not want to have anything to do with me and he has blocked me on all social media platforms. And that lesson is that you need to invest in yourself and let your ex be free. I think a relationship with this person will be difficult because times like this make him want to flee. We were trying for a baby and had been together years. Shall I give up or can I tell him I am here? Lets say that you are doing the no contact rule and you happen to run into a stubborn guy who wont contact you at all. Im 4 months out from a 7-year break-up, and the past few months we hooked-up, hung out, had fun, and fought for each other here and there. This is why, if your ex has texted you during No Contact, don't mess her around by not responding to her, or replying to her but acting like you're not really interested in her anymore (e.g. 3. While your expectations have been managed your only human and you cant help but wonder what is going on in his mind. I say things i dont mean, i curse a lot and has been paranoid. People have a tendency to only remember the bad stuff about the relationships towards the end. If you are an avid reader of this site then you have probably come across my massive 10,000 word guide on how to get your ex boyfriend back. He said I deserve better and cannot wait. In the beginning he was periodically call me and text me very little now that Im at this point he has been calling me every day as often as multiple times a day. Lets start out with probably the most likely reason that he may not contact you during no contact, his stubborn nature. Then you are going to be extremely disappointed and depressed if stuff like this doesnt happen at all. She said that she doesnt know how to make you happy and that she feels that she just makes you mad. This is SOOOO wrong on so many different levels. My Husband Still Works With The Woman He Had An Affair With, posting depressing things online and feeling sorry for yourself. In essence, they are continually practicing their social skills. Towards the beginning of this guide I went on this whole rant about how the no contact rule can still be working even if your ex doesnt contact you. None of us can help people who cant help themselvesesp with emotional stuff. If you really think she is posting how happy she is to simply make you jealousthen youre letting her manipulate you. Hes gone abroad so I am implementing the no contact for the week hes away. Now, there are a number of reasons an ex might choose to unfollow you. My boyfriend ended our 5 and a half year relationship by saying he wasnt happy. Going no contact is particularly useful after a relationship's breakup, especially if you were the one who was dumped or betrayed. So I dont think it was really necessary to contact me. They may not think about them as strongly and frequently as you think about your ex (especially right after the breakup), but they certainly dont erase dumpees from their memory. Thanks. My bf and I were together over 6 years. When your ex contacts you during no contact it is important you don't reply right away. I caught my boyfriend with his best friend girlfriend having sex and she has 2 kids for her boyfriend but I still love my boyfriend and I want him back I just started the no contact rule I actually blocked his line 3 days ago which I intend unblocking for 30 days but I can get a notification if he tries reaching my line. Most women get extremely depressed when an ex boyfriend doesn't message them at all during the no contact period. Dumpers dont think nearly as much about you, as you do about them. So what do you say when your ex contacts you during no contact (or after no contact)? Basically, it's just too painful for him/it bothers him/he doesn't want to see photos of you or know what you're doing/he wants to get the image of you . His heart wants nothing more than to check up on you and see how you are doing. Don't answer his messages, don't visit his social media profiles, remove him from your fb feed so you don't receive the daily updates. It had never even bothered me before as I always think its the past who cares, I do think though where Ive been sitting indoors on lockdown all day these things have got to me as sitting about all day with nothing to do and I live alone so was thinking about stuff Id never usually think about. I told her I absolutely cant do that right now, and dont even know if I will ever. This victimized role he is going to place himself in is going to cause him to want revenge on you in some way shape or form. What to do .. speak myself? 6. Originally, I thought it would be fun to write a massive program on how to get your ex boyfriend back and see what happened. So far we have talked about the progression that a guy goes through (in his mind) if he is going to get back at you. Dont remember? With the help from my friends I started to notice that this relationship aint going anywhere. Im just wondering whether I should give up and never contact him again. As I teach in my No Contact Rule Book, some men are extremely stubborn and will refuse to be the one that reaches out first during the no contact period. Here are some things that could go wrong for your ex during no contact and make your ex think about you: Most people think about their exes when their lives are going very bad. One of the most overlooked factors when it comes to the no contact rule is how the actual breakup will affect your boyfriend. So, they are probably going to be thinking of the whole no contact experience as a game. What do you think is considered a long time for an ex boyfriend to respond to you? Beware of that. Believe me when I say it takes a man who is incredibly stubborn to not contact you during a 30 day NC period. Or it definitely etely over for him? If you want your ex back because youre hurting and your relationship wasnt that great, you want your ex back for the wrong reasons. Thks, Hi, in a relationship for just less than I year. And also look into different living situations so you are not living together long term while broken up. The first person to reach out loses the game and they will refuse to lose that game. Seriously, I am so used to messaging girls (who I am romantically interested in) first that it is kind of annoying to me to keep doing it. I mentioned she had a story still on her Instagram of her ex, why did she still have it, obviously that makes me look jealous though so I wish I hadnt mentioned it, she said she didnt even realise it was there, and she hasnt watched it and its over a year old, I said she asked me to remove everything of my ex from my profile and I did when we first met (I had like 3 posts on my insta from like a year ago) as I knew how It made her feel, so how do you think it makes me feel to see that, as I still follow her. You Win Your Power Back. My Ex Won't Talk To Me No Matter What I Do. What Happens When You Ignore A Breadcrumber? How Does The Dumper Feel After A Month Of No Contact? All of this is irrelevant if she doesnt get to the last stage in decent time when you still want her. Do I reach out? We had few text in the first 10 day then I have been silent for the last. I really dont want her to forget about me and actually would like her to come crawling back. He hasnt replied since and its been 2 weeks hes really stubborn and is very protective of his pride. She's telling you that she wanted to stay but it hurt her to do so and her unfriending you is her taki. If for the dumpee, the best way to heal and move on is to do no contact (which I agree, given the phrase out of sight, out of mind is certainly the best way to heal) why wouldnt the same apply for the dumper? 11. Heres the issue. Either way, no contact is your savior as it will stop your incessant need for love and connection and help you realize that if your ex doesnt want to be with you, someone else will. A Bothersome Ex. The no contact rule is meant to tap into that loss and cause an ex boyfriend to contact you but is that the true purpose of the no contact rule? Recently I called him during the day but he didnt pick and so I decided to send him a message enquiring why he was not picking my calls. I know youre hurting and dont want to be forgotten, but dont let your destroyed self-esteem affect your rational thinking. If you don't unfriend your ex from facebook, you are going to end up looking at their profile sooner or later. He has an avoidant attachment style and has difficulty expressing his emotions. He didn't unfriend me for a while (during which time he started posting pictures of himself with other girls), but then he unfriended and blocked me completely and kicked me from a group in which he was the admin. Heck, most people make relationship decisions based on their emotions. All these things will affect your emotions and your thoughts. Or, is it a facade? 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